I found out I was pregnant at 4 weeks. I can remember being at work shortly thereafter, and I told one of my best buddies I was pregnant. We were both so excited. I was having a bit of pain, but I thought it was just the baby settling or something.
But the next day, I was still having that pain. I’m a nurse, and I was caring for a baby in the NICU. During that shift, I ended up transporting a baby to another hospital in an ambulance, and I remember feeling so uncomfortable. I got back to the hospital and my pain was getting worse. Still no bleeding at that time.
I talked to the charge nurse. I explained that I was pregnant, and worried I might be miscarrying, but there was no bleeding. I started crying. I was so scared. She sent me home. I called my husband and said, “I think something is wrong.” I went to my family doctor’s office. They ended up booking me for an emergency ultrasound the next day.
I drove home and told my husband what was happening. The pain just kept coming on and off, and it did start to get worse. I had intense shoulder tip pain, and because of my nursing experience, I know it can be a sign of internal bleeding. After our son had gone to bed, I said to my husband, “We need to go to the hospital. I am worried this is an ectopic pregnancy and I am bleeding internally. I have this feeling I am going to need surgery.” He was alarmed. I wavered again and said maybe I was overthinking things.
I tried my best to rest, but within 30-45 minutes, I could not handle the pain any longer. My husband went next door to ask our neighbour to come stay with our son. We went into the hospital and I was seen immediately. There was no ultrasound availability, so they started an IV and decided to wait until morning when we could do an ultrasound.
I had a massive hematoma in my belly. My hemoglobin was only 82, and I ended up needing a blood transfusion. They were preparing me to go to surgery right away.
I remember talking to my mom, and my son, and being so scared. I was a disaster, just crying and crying. I remember they asked me to lie down on the bed in the OR.
And then I woke up. And it was all done. Everything sank in, what I had gone through, and I just remember being so angry. We were told it was okay to try again in 2–3 months, but I just remember feeling so much anger and grief and loneliness.
Waiting on Sunrise 